nebris: (The Temple 2)
[personal profile] nebris
~A few days ago I wrote the following, “I never wanted to be a 'guru'. It's a brutal and heartbreaking Path and usually ends in failure and a lonely or violent death.” Grim, but not really all that pessimistic if one honestly reviews the historical record. Prophets are usually hated in their own times and tend to die unheeded.

The past day or so I have been under the weather and tired and that always gets me all emo and shit. I whine and cry and beat my breast...and then I get past that and keep on.

I expect I shall do that again. I'm already half way there. And at the moment I'm really fucking tired. I should have slept six or seven hours, but only managed three.

So now of course all my fears and self doubt are crawling out the woodwork and clawing at me. I've wept a few times, fallen deep into despair and self pity. [I fucking hate self pity!!]

I'm also washing my bed linen and plan to wash my hair. [waaaay overdue] And I'm blathering here into this desk top file. Not much else I can do right now. Too tired to really focus on any serious writing and I don't feel like watching any of the shows I've got downloaded. [a fuckton tbh]

I'm sorta stalled right there...so I'll shut up now...

PS Mercury goes Direct tomorrow.

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The Divine Mr. M

August 2017

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