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I'm very angry today...
Dreams about my parents thwarting me in something or another. That was my whole life with them and I never could figure out how - or muster the will - to escape it. And now I'm old and all the dreams I had for my life are dead and gone.
I did figure out that what they did was all about Melvin trying to control me. Ultimately that is why he raped me at nine years old. It was to 'teach me a lesson'. It wasn't violent or coercive, it was seductive, the most damaging type of childhood sexual abuse. I was meant to like it and, the first few times, I did.
...and that's all I can handle saying right now.
Dreams about my parents thwarting me in something or another. That was my whole life with them and I never could figure out how - or muster the will - to escape it. And now I'm old and all the dreams I had for my life are dead and gone.
I did figure out that what they did was all about Melvin trying to control me. Ultimately that is why he raped me at nine years old. It was to 'teach me a lesson'. It wasn't violent or coercive, it was seductive, the most damaging type of childhood sexual abuse. I was meant to like it and, the first few times, I did.
...and that's all I can handle saying right now.
