"Women's Words"

[nebris]

~I first posted this back in March of 2007. I thought this a good time to repost.

~Below the cut is a scene from my screenplay "Four Women Together". [click on the link to read the entire script] The 4 women in question play the 'game' Women's Words. The 'game' itself is simply a 'feminist' variation I made up on an old psych exercise. I was thinking of it the other day and am posting it here for your edification.

All the events spoken of here come from real experiences told to me by women over the years. I merely synthesized them into this scene.

A Caveat: this is full of triggers, so proceed carefully.


Int. The Living Room - Night

The Women sit on the floor around the Little Table. The room lit by a Fire in the Fireplace, Candles on the Table. Megan looks around the Circle.

Megan
Are we ready?

Gretchen
(soft)
Yes.

Theresa
Sure.

Sarah
Let's do it.

Megan holds up a Sewing Needle, looks at Sarah. Sarah holds her hand out, Forefinger extended. Megan pricks it, draws Blood. Sarah looks at the Blood, smiles. Theresa extends her finger. Megan pricks it. Gretchen chews her lip, extends her finger. Megan pricks it. Megan then pricks her own finger.

Cut To:

The Women press their Fingers together over the Table.

All
Four together, heed our call,
we are sisters, all in all.
Four together, heed our call,
we are sisters, all in all.
Four together, heed our call,
we are sisters, all in all.

They withdraw their fingers, smile at each other misty eyed.

Cut To:

Gretchen is cutting up a Sheet of Paper into small Pieces. Each Piece has a Word Written on it. She places the Pieces into a Mixing Bowl. The Women watch her.

Gretchen
I learned this exercise about ten years ago when I lived in a women's group home.

Sarah
What was it that you called this?

Gretchen
"Women's Words".
(indicating the Bowl)
Each piece of paper has a word on it that has profound meaning for women.
('mixes up' the Pieces in the Bowl)
We pick a word at random, and then each of us says what that word means for her.
(looks around at them)
We found it worked best if you told 'a truth' about the word, like a specific event in your life.

Sarah shrugs, reaches into the Bowl, retrieves a Piece of Paper, reads it.

Sarah
(dismayed laugh)
I can't fucking believe this.

Gretchen
What?

Sarah
"Menstruation".

They all laugh nervously, look at each other.

Gretchen
Okay. It's my idea, so I'll go first.
(takes a deep breath)
I didn't get my period until I was fourteen. I was a runaway, living in a "squat" up in Hollywood. It came at night, and when I woke up, I was covered with blood. I thought I was dying. I started screaming, crying. Several girls laughed at me, but one of them told me what it was, gave me some cloth to...Well, you know.
(sighs)
There, that's it.

Everyone is silent. Gretchen looks around at them.

Sarah
Right.
(takes a deep breath)
My turn, I guess.
(laughs thinly)
My mom told me about getting my period, gave me pads and stuff, like it was no big deal. But, when I was..seventeen, I think, she saw tampons in my purse and went ballistic, screaming about how I'd lose my virginity and shit. When I said I'd already lost it, she slapped me, called me a "slut". We didn't talk for maybe two weeks.

Sarah looks at Gretchen. They smile warmly.

Theresa
I got my period when I was eleven. Before I went to bed each night, my mother would..
(gets this amazed look)
You know, I never thought about this before. Every night before she put me to bed, my mother would make me pee. I mean, make me, you know, by rubbing..by rubbing..
(starts crying)
By rubbing my vagina. And when I started bleeding the first time, she was doing..that. And she got
upset cause I got her "dirty".

She cries harder and Sarah holds her.

Gretchen
We don't have to do this anymore.

Megan
(stone faced)
No. I want to say mine.

Gretchen looks at Sarah and Theresa. Theresa nods, wipes her tears, smiles a little.

Theresa
I think this will be good for us.

Sarah
Yeah, if we can't share this here, where can we? I mean, well, I'm closer to you guys than I am to my..my 'real' sisters. Well, half sisters.

They look at each other tenderly. Megan takes a deep breath, sighs, stares at the Candles.

Megan
(flat)
My mother told me nothing about my period. I freaked out when it started. She wouldn't even talk to me about it. Just gave me a little booklet 'explaining' it. That and some kind of 'harness' for holding sanitary napkins.

They are quiet for a moment. Megan reaches into the Bowl, 'picks a word', looks at the Piece of Paper.

Megan
(laughs cynically)
"Father".

Sarah
(sarcastic)
Oh, we love this game.

Gretchen
Well, it's not really a game. It's an exercise to get in touch with your feelings. And we're supposed to do three rounds.

Sarah is about to reply, but Megan holds up her hand.

Megan
I'll go first this time, okay?

She looks at the others. They all nod "yes".

Megan
My father left when I was six. He committed suicide a year later. But my mother never told me. She said he died of a heart attack. It wasn't until I was nineteen, I was moving out and going through papers, that I found his Death Certificate.
(pauses, then 'matter of fact')
"Self Inflicted Gunshot Wound".
(takes a deep breath)
I'd always felt isolated in school, like people thought I was weird. Truth was, they knew about my father, and I didn't, so, no one really knew what to say to me. So they didn't say anything.
(looks at the others, shrugs, then, ironically)
"Father".

Sarah
(angry)
My father is a fucking bastard! I wish he did blow his fucking brains out, the drunken son of a bitch! He used to beat the shit out of me and my mother at least once a week. I think he got off on it. You know, sexually. When I was fifteen, I pulled a knife on him, said if he ever laid a hand on me ever again, I'd stick it in his fucking chest while he was asleep. He kept screaming, but, he never touched me again.
('spits')
Fucking cocksucker!

She looks like she wants to cry, but won't let herself.

Theresa
(spacey)
He's distant. Like some god on a pedestal.
(shakes herself, 'comes back')
He used to be a big wheel at the Justice Department. My mother totally hero-worshipped him, let him walk all over her. He always had mistresses. Went on vacations with them, while my mother stayed home being the "little woman". He even had the nerve to bring these women into the house. Several times at Christmas, as 'guests'. The worst part for my mother is that I liked them. I was a kid, and they
were pretty, and always nice to me, gave me presents. I didn't know.

She sighs, looks at Gretchen.

Gretchen
(quiet)
My father was a junkie. Lived on the street mostly. Here in L.A. He was a petty thief, not violent, just burglary.
(smiles)
"B n' E", he called it. I saw him a few times when I was nineteen. I'd buy him lunch. He wouldn't take any money from me. He seemed like a nice guy. Told me he was sorry for being weak.
(looks sad)
A couple of years after we last spoke, I was contacted by the police. "Next of kin", they said. They told me he'd been murdered under a freeway a few months earlier.

Sarah looks at her compassionately.

Sarah
Oh, man.

Gretchen
(small smile)
At least I got to..to talk with him in a real way, to say how I felt. And I got to see that in his own imperfect way, he did love me.

Sarah
(wistful)
Yeah.

They all look at each other.

Gretchen
One more round?

Everyone sort of smiles. Gretchen reaches into the Bowl, pulls out one more Piece of Paper. When she reads it, she is a little taken aback.

Gretchen
I..I think maybe we could pass on this one.

Sarah
What?

Gretchen hands her the paper. Sarah just looks at it.

Theresa
Come on, it can't be that..Fuck! What am I saying?

Sarah
"Rape".

Gretchen
(looks around)
Have any of you ever been raped?

Theresa
(distant)
My brother. He raped me. I was seven and he was fifteen. He was captain of his high school football team, and I thought he was a hero. Big and handsome. I liked that he paid attention to me. I let him touch me. It felt good. And I loved him. And there was more touching, and he started coming into my room. And then it started hurting. I locked my door, but he pried it open with a butter knife. I told my mother, but, she hushed it all up. "Mustn't upset your father", she said. I was sent to a boarding school until my brother went to college. And no one said a word. Ever.
(smiles a 'childlike' smile)
There, that wasn't so bad.

Gretchen smiles gently, but Megan and Sarah are 'blank'.

Gretchen
I grew up on a commune in Washington state. Well, it was a cult, really. They believed that children should be 'sexualized'. That's the word they used. Said it was a "sacred activity". So, from six to twelve I was...essentially, raped two, three times a week. My mother told me it was "God's Work", and to enjoy it. The truly evil part is that sometimes, I did. But by the time I was twelve, I'd had enough, and I ran away.

She looks at Megan.

Megan
(flat)
It was my uncle. He came to stay with us. He was always drinking. He started coming in my room at night. And he..he did things to me. I thought I was dead. And then..he was gone. Got killed in a car crash. I was glad. I hoped it hurt. I wanted him to hurt. And I felt evil that I wanted that.
(starts to Cry)
I told my boyfriend when I was twenty. We got stoned and out of nowhere, I started telling him about my uncle. In detail. And it turned him on. I couldn't believe it. And he wanted to have sex with me. I said "No way". So he raped me.
(SOBS)
The son of a bitch raped me!

Gretchen puts her arms around Megan, who just Sobs. No one says a word. Finally Sarah 'gathers herself'.

Sarah
I've never told this to anyone. Some people know, but, I've never talked about it.
(pauses, then 'plunges ahead')
I was gang raped in high school. Twice. The first time, well, it wasn't so bad.
(laughs humorlessly)
I was dating this guy, I don't even remember his name. We went to this party and he dumped me. He met some other girl and just left. Not a word, nothing. I was devastated. I got so fucking drunk, I couldn't stand. I don't know how I got into the bedroom. I vaguely remember making out with someone. And then, I'm naked, and one guy is fucking me, and another one is putting his dick in my mouth, and there are..two, three, four others. I'm not sure.
(stares blankly)
They just did what they wanted to. And I thought somewhere that's all I was good for. After that, I was the "school whore". I didn't sleep with anyone else, but, I was still a "whore".
(fighting back tears)
And then..there was Jimmy. Jimmy Kaser. I loved him so much.
(takes a deep breath)
It was more than a year later. Jimmy and I dated a few times, made out in his car, touched each other. Like you're supposed to do in high school. And we went to a party. His ex-girlfriend was there, and she was all torn up over him. Jimmy had a good heart. Or maybe not. I don't know. But he paid attention to her, and I felt abandoned, and got real drunk, and..And wound up in a bedroom again. With a few guys and my clothes off, and..
(starts Crying)
I don't remember a lot. But, I can still see Jimmy in the doorway watching me and.. and..he was hurt and pissed off..fucked up.
(SOBS)
He..he..he..came in and..he..he did it to me, with them.
('falls apart')
HE DID IT TO ME WITH THEM! OH, GOD! OH, GOD! And I was just a whore! That's all I was! Just a whore!

They are all Crying now. Theresa puts her arms around Sarah, pulls her over to Gretchen and Megan. They hold each other and Cry.