Her Prophet Speaks
Mar. 25th, 2014 06:17 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
nebris~I suspect it is just as well that I shall most likely not see the real birth of the New Matriarchy. I'm probably too emotionally damaged to deal with the realities that shall come with such.
I was scrolling through my Facebook friends early, about a half an hour after I'd woken up. Had not had coffee yet, but was in a decent mood. Then I saw a meme about abandoning pets, with a cat and some poignant text, and I fell apart. Took me a few minutes to stanch the tears.
As I made my coffee a short while later, I thought to myself, “You would not survive the loss of the first Sister who dies while building the New Matriarchy. You'd wrack yourself with guilt and second guess all of the Work.”
I have the intellectual capacity for ruthlessness, but I these days I seriously doubt that I have the emotional capacity. And building this thing will require a fair amount of ruthlessness and great sacrifice.
I cannot regret that I am this damaged. It has made me who I am and allowed me to see that which I see. My Wounds and my Damage are the sacrifice that I have made. It is my Gift to you, my Sisters.
I was scrolling through my Facebook friends early, about a half an hour after I'd woken up. Had not had coffee yet, but was in a decent mood. Then I saw a meme about abandoning pets, with a cat and some poignant text, and I fell apart. Took me a few minutes to stanch the tears.
As I made my coffee a short while later, I thought to myself, “You would not survive the loss of the first Sister who dies while building the New Matriarchy. You'd wrack yourself with guilt and second guess all of the Work.”
I have the intellectual capacity for ruthlessness, but I these days I seriously doubt that I have the emotional capacity. And building this thing will require a fair amount of ruthlessness and great sacrifice.
I cannot regret that I am this damaged. It has made me who I am and allowed me to see that which I see. My Wounds and my Damage are the sacrifice that I have made. It is my Gift to you, my Sisters.
