Kitteh Nooz

~As of yesterday afternoon, there is enough cash in the vet account to proceed with whatever this is going to be. Emotionally, I was unable to call them and schedule an appointment.

I just got up about an hour ago. I suspect I'll only be up for a another three hours or so. [I'm a mess] But I'll call this afternoon. *sigh* I'm immensely grateful to our Primary Donor...and massively ambivalent about what will come next.

Random

~As I stated earlier, I am an emotional mess. My thoughts and feelings are all over the map.

I put my fan-fic novel on the back burner because it stopped being Fun and started to become Work and if it's gonna be Work then I might as well put that into one of my own projects. I have learned what I needed to from the thing, so that's something.

There is something else going on which I shall keep to myself for now, but which is signals a major internal shift. [no, it's not 'biological'] It is also another thing I'm ambivalent about, hence my turbulent state of mind.

This is also why I stated that I was going back to bed after a few hours. My brain is still in Barrel of Eels Mode....

fuck

..each time I go to call the vet, I fall apart..