The Divine Mr. M

~I am so fucking tired of trying to explain things to the hysterical. And honestly, I am a fool for trying. But such is my nature.

Parkland and all the mass shootings before it [and those yet to come]. 400 days of Trump. Alt Right assholes. SJW control freaks. Asset forfeiture. Militarized police who 'fear for their lives'. Wall Street vampires sucking the life blood out of everything. Catastrophic Climate Change...and on and on and on and on. [I mostly blast the Right here because they are so base, but the Left is really no better at being blinded by their own ideological nonsense]

This is COLLAPSE, kids. The End of Things As We Know Them...or at least think we did. It's a slow process so most don't really see...and most really don't want to. But Rome took centuries to fall.

So many cling to their diminishing fortunes, completely in denial and looking for a Savior, be it Bernie or The Donald. Sorry...

...nothing we can do will stop this. We can only ride it out and lay the foundations of what shall come after...and something will come after. We'll survive. The transit will be harsh af, but we'll survive. Humans are like cockroaches, seriously hard to kill off. [if you really know me, you're aware of what I work toward 'coming after']

sigh...so tired..gonna hide in a superhero movie and forget for a while...

~My mind is fecund with ideas. I've been making notes and chapter lists and character outlines and so on for months now. I've generated the makings of four workable novels in half as many months....

...and have not have either the mental focus nor the physical stamina to follow through upon any of them. So I have surrendered to this 'process'. When an Idea makes itself known, I run with as best as I can [the above 'note taking' etc] until its fire fades within me.

At least this way I have them marinading somewhere in my psyche with an actual outline lurking in my desk...along with the other dozen or so 'novel makings'.

I do take some small comfort in knowing I can write 'novelistically'. I proved that to myself last year with the first few chapters of my abortive Fanfic novel.

~I suspect I'm suffering from a form of mental and emotional exhaustion. We've stabilized our living situation and our finances to the point where we are no longer 'in survival mode'. Therefore much of the fear drive that kept me moving as dissipated.

Now I'm just burnt out. Guess that's why I'm sleeping so much. And that tiredness leads to a type of depression, as I cannot summon the 'umph' to do more than basic life tasks like shopping, cooking, washing and so forth.

I don't even have anymore to say here....